Things you should know.

I invented avocado toast, but it was ahead of its time.

I believe in Oxford Commas and Pilot G-2 0.7 pens.

Don’t ask me what I think about Zelda, D&D,

I accept bribes in the form of million-dollar increments and kittens.

Someone once told me pink is “unprofessional.” So I made an unprofessional website.